Through life challenges and trauma, usually occurring in childhood, people with BPD develop a strong sensitivity. They’re easily hurt. One source suggests that it’s like going through life without skin–without the protective barrier that prevents pain receptors from being exposed. Someone with BPD is much more hurt by someone’s words and actions than a person without BPD. Under certain conditions being hurt by someone can be excruciating.

Once in a while this results in uncontrollable anger (emotional dysregulation)–emotional response rooted in our childhood. We’re helpless to control it. If not understood, a person displaying such behavior might be considered bad or evil, and be treated that way. To be treated as though we’re bad or evil when we’re not at all that way, can be extremely harmful to the suffering person. This is especially true when she is already very sensitive.

One friend told her that when that kind of anger comes upon her, it seems like she’s going to attack. What people don’t see is that she’s not like that at all on the inside. Don’t judge a person with BPD by the emotions we show. You will come to see that we who live with BPD need not be feared. Physically harming others is uncommon.

“Although the term “dysregulation” might not be immediately understood, most of us have seen dysregulation at one point or another.  Dysregulation can be seen in the grocery store when children throw themselves onto the ground and are literally unable to calm themselves down. Or when a parent stands stoically at a loved one’s funeral, seemingly incapable of showing any real sense of emotional loss or distress.” [1]

It’s a response to a situation.

[1] Types Of Dysregulation: Definition And Differences, Laura Angers