I love reading what I wrote in the last post from 2010. I was a good person. A person who loved much – with the kind of love Jesus wants us have. I helped many through their mental health difficulties. More than I’ll ever remember.

In the post below I hear the sweetness I used to have. But that sweetness is gone. Trauma took it away. I’m no longer a very “nice” person. It’s hard to live, knowing that who I once was will not be back. Nor will people’s good opinions of me. It takes everything I have to hang onto my relationships.

Most will think that a person’s poor personality bothers those nearby. But I don’t think they realize how painful it is to herself. It’s enough to want to give up on life itself. Especially when you look back and see the person you used to be.