I have spoken much in the blog posts from these early years about the warmth and care shown to me by church friends. They helped me experience what God was like through the love they gave me. Through them I was able to truly “feel” God’s love. You have seen my happiness expressed throughout my writings.

But at some point the friends who had showered me with love left me without explanation, cruelly hurting me. The loss gave me great pain – pain that is with me still. It will probably always haunt me. Today, in 2019, happiness like I had seldom appears.

I’m glad that in following years I was able to cling to God, especially while I wrote my devotionals. But I’ve never been able to replace the kind of love I once had.

I pray that I’ll be able to stay near to God as I struggle with the frequent depressions my current illness is bringing, My life is very different.