After I started following God I came to see that what I had needed most was not the peace or the strength God offered. Mostly I longed for love. Through God I did find that love—a deep and steadfast love. He provided me with a warm sense of security.
I suffered much. There were times I didn’t think I could go on. Despite that, I didn’t doubt God’s love for me. His presence shone brightly through my friends at church. Thanks to them I found the security I needed. They stayed close. I came to trust that God was always with me.
I wonder how many—even as adults—need to be held close like this by someone who cares. Most should have received such security from parents during childhood. But for some that love was lacking and they were left hungering for it. It’s not uncommon to grow up in a home where healthy love is lacking. That can cause problems in adulthood. It did for me.
I wished I could overcome such need to be in constant contact with the people who cared about me. It must be hard for them to always have me enter their busy lives with a phone call or email. I worried I might lose these precious friends. Years later I did, bringing great suffering!
marja
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