(November 1, 2006)

I think I’ve now stabilized and won’t have to push forward the doctor’s appointment I have in a couple of weeks. I feel good when I can go through a busy time – a bit of a destabilizing time – and yet stay on top – even though it IS a struggle. It feels good to know that I’ll be able to see my doctor and fill him in on the many things I’ve been doing and experiencing and to be able to tell him I survived in spite of it.

What helps is that I lead a varied life. I don’t get much chance to get bored. Being busy helps. On Monday my husband and I spent most of the day looking after his 95-year-old mom. She needed to go to the eye doctor and do some shopping. Then we took her out for lunch. Today, on Wednesday, we went to my 92-year-old mom to take HER to the doctor, take her shopping and out for lunch. Tomorrow I’ll go for a walk with a friend who is going through a bit of a rough time. The talking we do will do both of us good. I’ll also get ready for the ladies’ Bible study meeting at my house Friday morning.

I work on photographs and I work on my latest book (though I think I should focus a lot more on that than I’m doing right now). I go to Curves, camera club, a writer’s workshop, church and Bible study.

So, my life is: A bit of time at home, at bit of time out. A bit of time doing things for others, a bit of time doing things for myself. A bit of time doing chores, and a bit of time doing creative things. A bit of active time, and a bit of quiet time. Reading and writing. Eating and feeding. Thinking and speaking. Giving and receiving.

It’s all about balance isn’t it? Especially for us bipolars! How much can we actually do for ourselves to keep ourselves well? To what extent is how we live our life and the attitudes we bring to it, responsible for how well we do?

I know one thing. I could not even begin to live as normal a life as I do without medication. I have not always been as well as I am now-a-days. This wellness is something I will never take for granted. It is the most valuable thing I have. I thank God for it and pray that I will use it well.