Dear Marja,

I cried reading your article entitled “Feeling Hated?” dated June 7th because I can truly relate.

Sometimes what keeps me going are your articles. My struggles are no longer so much about my illness as I have learned how to handle that now especially with the medicines and some self help stuff I learned from WRAP. What is hard to overcome is really the stigma…self stigma, stigma from others…the fear of it…feeling hated…feeling talked about…the feeling of being a burden…the feeling of being unloved. Plus I have past issues and traumatic events that I haven’t really dealt with a counselor/doctor yet. And these are so triggering. It breaks my heart, Marja. It makes me angry sometimes. I don’t know how to manage myself when I get triggered. It makes me feel so alone.

And I can relate to what the Kipling poem said: “when being lied about, don’t deal in lies, or, being hated, don’t give way to hating.”

I can’t help it…I always forgive and just ignore those people who stabbed me behind and just forgive because this is what I was taught growing up. But I question sometimes… if I am not going to stand up for myself who else will? If I give in to my emotions and talk to those people who I think are stigmatizing me and give them my piece of mind…I might hurt them and that will lead to more guilty feelings. I just do not know who to trust anymore as I feel when I say something it will all come back to me. I just do not know what to do anymore.