(October 1, 2007)

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed and exhausted lately, into a space where I’ve been doubting myself, not able to see how I could possibly manage all the work I’ve taken on. I’ve felt like I might be on the brink of another depression.

My friends have comforted me with extra attention and support. They have been praying for me and with me. This has helped me not to be fearful, but hopeful, trusting that God will help me turn this around.

But a couple of days ago I discovered the source of my fatigue and slight depression. I’m quite sure that it’s mostly due to sleep deprivation. The many cups of coffee I drink throughout the day, combined with the stimulant medication I take, has meant that I’ve only been getting six hours of sleep per night. For over three months I’ve been getting up by 5 am every morning. I never complained because I enjoy the early rising – such a wonderful opportunity for a long quiet time before I start the day. Maybe I need a lot more rest than I’ve been getting.

I took a friend’s advice and started drinking mostly decaf coffee. After only one day of this, I’m already feeling a difference. I feel less tired and more able to do my work. I’m more relaxed – more calm. Amazing!

I think my prayers and the prayers of my friends have been answered.