Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Colossians 3:12


When I most needed love, I was treated with frustration. Anger. “Why don’t you pull yourself together?” he seemed to say.

Like many, he thought that illnesses of the mind could be controlled. “Can’t you just think it away in the way you think other things?”

I was blamed for my pain—for my suffering—though they were not my fault. Ashamed, I felt like there must be something terribly wrong with me.

It seems impossible for those who haven’t been in that place of emotional anguish to understand that this too is illness. That this pain can be as unbearable as the pain of physical illness. Like physical illnesses, this too may need to be managed with meds and allowed to run its course.

We need friends who will stand by, with patience, empathy and love. Isn’t this what people with all illnesses need most?

But many don’t understand that mental illness is an illness not unlike others. And so, we’re blamed.

The anger continues far too long. And the pain deepens.