(December 9, 2008)

I’ve been on a roller coaster for about two months now – times when I’ve been okay and other times when I’ve felt very down, not knowing how I can continue, wishing I could get off the ride.

I’ve heard some people with bipolar say how they think they are well and will always be well. They’ve learned to handle life and their illness in such a way that it will never pose a problem for them again.

The truth is that once you have the disorder, you can never be sure of your wellness. The depression will always return. Medications need to be changed and the downturn will have to run its course. It can be very discouraging. You wonder if you can ever be counted on again.

I’ve been fortunate. I’ve had a lot of support – good friends and an understanding husband.

A good friend pointed me to the Psalms to give me support and encouragement. And I read how “The Lord is the stronghold of my life.” (Psalm 27:1) I cling to words like those and find peace reading them. God will hold me up and give me the strength to do the things I need to do. And I know He loves me.