I confused them with God himself
My Monday devotional from December 18th explains how badly I need God in my life. How very badly I need his love! How very badly many of you need his love! It’s at http://marjabergen.com/archives/he-watches-over-us if you’d like to have a look.
Lord, I see your love shining through the people who have supported me. And today I realize how it was you I needed, it was your love I had longed for all along. I confused my supporters with you and could not recognize them as the people they were. I overlooked the fact that they have the same needs I do. What a lot of pressure I put on them!
Yes, Jesus, they were so much like I think you yourself are. Warm smiles and hugs. Kind words. Your Spirit in the things they told me about. An interest in my life. I felt they cared about me and wanted to support me. They became the mother and father for the child I still had inside me. The kind of parents I had always needed. In my supporters I found the godlike spirit that showed me the love I never had. I learned what God was like. I found my heavenly Father.
But, I have learned, God, that a godlike spirit only shows what you are like. Having a godlike spirit does not make you God himself. What a wonderful gift my supporters are to be a presence for people who need you. What great love they gave me – a sacrificial love. But help me, Lord, not to further take advantage of their gift. What can I do for them?
Help me remember that my supporters are human beings. Human beings with limited resources. Human beings with their own needs, just like me.
Why, Lord, was it so hard for me to understand that? Why is it so hard to care for these loving individuals in the way they care for me and for others?
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