THE IMPORTANCE OF LISTENING

To listen to others is to be shown the respect every human being deserves, even if a person does have bipolar disorder. Not to be heard indicates that you’re not considered to matter.

From my blog, on March 9, 2012:

I’m delighted. My new medication has helped me stabilize well. No sign of depression or mania. I feel that I can apply myself wholeheartedly again to my Living Room work.

But . . . and this is a big but . . .

My tremors are horrible. Jerky. Day before yesterday I dropped a glass in the bathroom sink when I was getting a drink of water. When I picked it up I dropped it again. I dropped dishes when I was filling the dishwasher. I can’t hang onto the soap when I take a shower.

On July 7,  I wrote:

A couple of weeks ago I was pouring boiling water into a carafe and I had one of the jerky tremors I often have and poured the water on my wrist instead. It created a nasty burn. My legs are affected as well. Last week I was trying to help some people out carrying things down a flight of stairs. I had to give up because I almost fell several times—just could not do those stairs without hanging onto the banister. I have a hard time doing the circuit at the gym, because changing machines is such a clumsy ordeal for me. I feel like I’m becoming a cripple.

My psychiatrist would not listen. The frustrating thing is that he doesn’t seem to be considering this a serious problem. He’s blaming all kinds of things—other meds, my age—but not the meds he gave me. Yet it’s when I started taking this medication that these severe tremors started.

I wish he would hear me! I wish he would treat me with more respect!

Last year, in 2023, I came off the medication but the damage was irreversible. I need a walker because I developed ataxia – a disability that can cause me to lose my balance and fall at any time. The psychiatrist had been warned by a neurologist, that the meds he was giving me were causing my problems. But he wouldn’t listen.

My life, and my husband’s life, have been seriously affected.

marja