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Near the beginning of this year, a couple of months after being told I have features of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), I decided I needed to write. I wanted to talk about my super-sensitivity and emotional pain, my unintentional inappropriate behavior, and my feelings of rejection. I wanted to share with others who might be experiencing similar things. A book maybe? I had spent many years supporting people with mood disorders through my books, weekly devotionals that I send out in email form, and through Living Room, a support ministry I founded almost ten years ago. I have always felt that my calling was to support people who, like me,  live with mental health problems. Yes, I need to write – to help others and to help myself.

The emotional pain I had been suffering was greater than I could have imagined due to repeated hurtful treatment I had  experienced, dealt out by a person who I believed did not respect me. Flash backs of the hurt occurred almost every day – every day a different one. Often the pain was so intolerable that I wondered what I could do to end it. At one point, shortly before my BPD diagnosis, I ended up in hospital, having been close to committing suicide.

But I was getting help from counselors and DBT (dialectical behavior therapy), learning some ways of coping that were helping me deal better with the pain. I wondered: Could I teach such coping techniques to others while I myself am learning them? Could I share my experiences, and would my experiences encourage those who suffer like me? At least readers would realize they’re not alone. I decided that a blog rather than a book would be a good idea.  And that’s what I’m doing, starting with this post.

My aim is to tell parts of my story and pass along what I learn. This could be a place where I can try to encourage others. I want to explore ways to overcome this difficult and stigmatizing disorder. I believe there is hope for all of us. Let’s learn from each other.

Borderline Personality Disorder
It’s an illness, hard to overcome.
But we can overcome.
We will overcome.